Hello again world, How have you been?
I am great. I love New York, with a passion.
I feel like it likes me back.
Yesterday while eating at the shake shack with 4 other of the most fabulous women I know, we were trying to find a great table to sit at...during lunch hour, in Madison Square park, in the shade...impossible you say? uh, YEAH. Nevertheless ( I feel biblical when I say that word, like extra fancy) we prevailed, until I figured out why the seat was so available. It all started when I literally carried a table on top of my head over a crowd of peeps to insert myself and friends int he shade, because really the 90 degree weather and intense humidity was just a little too much fun for me. Whilest setting down said table I stepped on something extra soft. Hmmm. Gravel, is what I should be feelign right? ( I thougth to myself)
Yeah, I think thats why I have several tiny rocks rolling around in my cute shoes. So I lifted my foot only to find that I was not somehow stepping on a nice stray patch of grass or, a pretty flower, nope....it was something much better.
A. Dead. Bird.
I imidiatly tasted blood in my mouth, I am not sure why I react this way, I always have, everytime I run over someone elses roadkill by accident on the road, I taste blood in my mouth. Its not really there. Its my intensly overactive imagination, but either way, its there, all coppery and gross.
Dead bird. Dead bird. Dead bird.
I starrted dragging my leg around the ground like a homeboy with a janky leg. This is not uncommon here in New York, but for me, it was very uncoordinated and I was sure that if I looked under my shoe I would see baby bird eyeball stuck to my shoe or something.
Well if that wasn't enough halfway through the best burger you will ever eat....Some naked chic covered in paint,( it was a nice color scheme if I might add ) walks up to the middle of the park and just stands there. I could not stop staring at her pennys. ( thats code word for the pointy part of juicy doubles ) They were so perky. Why? Does paint bring this to be? Oh wait it was probably the fact that she was wearing only a thong in front of at least 600 people while a man painted more designs on her slender, albeit very naked body. I took a bunch of photos...of course.
Best part of the day?
That not one of us, even thougth twice about it. and most of the people didn't even look up. I mean we are talking seriously naked, and perky pennys people. The popo almost shut her down, But then they decided it was fine. I watched them tell her and her artist, it was no problem. I am positive it had nothing to do with the penny situation. absolutely positive.
Its art. Living, breathing, perky art. I wonder if it would have been "ok" if the painted naked subject was a perky man? I will try it as soon as I get a volunteer and let you know. You think Husb would be willing? I could like match the blue in his eyes or soemthing really cool. Thats what everyone will look at first, His eyes, and nothing else, I am positive. Which brings me to my next topic, I will now be taking donations for Bail, after I attempt this art project. Thousand dollar bills need only apply.
I guess thats what you get for eating lunch outside in New York.
Did I mention how much I love it here. Its just so perky!
